Times are changing. A section of society has started to believe in the worth of every woman because today women have made themselves feel confident and proud in their own skin. They have made themselves an epitome of 'the veritable free bird'- leading their lives according to their desires and making their own decisions and choices independently, albeit a slew of challenges. Even though the numbers of economically independent single women living in big cities have increased the question of social security is still fairly suboptimal.
In my view, the challenges faced by single women will never come to an end. There are lakhs of single women in cities of India who have been denied the requisite education resulting in them embarking on low income jobs. Worse there are also some very conservative families in our country, where women are not allowed to work due to which these women are in a weak position financially and even socially. There are also many single women who need to travel to other cities for work who contend with issues pertaining to safety on a perennial basis.
In many conservative and uneducated sections of our Indian society, women who choose to never get married are considered as having some 'flaw' that discourages all potential suitors. Divorced and separated women sadly undergo character assassination. Even today some widowed women (residing in cites too) are not being socially permitted to get into a new relationship or remarry. Single women of all age groups are speculated upon and often contend with an array of uncomfortable questions pertaining to their 'single status'. Why is marriage always considered as a woman's ultimate goal? Why, even in cities, do only women face such mental harassment inflicted by society?
Women are often told that they need to be 'protected' from the 'big cities' and 'bad world'. This way many families attempt to exert control over women who deserve to live independently. Such people make single women believe that women will never be able to live happily and securely all by themselves. Nazma Yasmin , a shop assistant in Guwahati says ,"I do not understand why we are told that in order to be safe , we must live and travel in the company of others at night in the city. This should not be told to women and girls rather to every man and adult boy so that we feel safe while travelling anytime in the public transport of the city."
Many people in the society are still of the view that single women residing in cities face loneliness issues. Kakali Das, a school teacher of Guwahati says, "Single women like me are not lonely. I am 32 years old and I have my own personal reasons which led me to stay single for the time being. Even if I have to stay like this for my entire life, I have no problem and if I don't have any issue then society must not have any issues either."
Single women who choose to not get married may crave for motherhood. Breaking the so-called stereotype, Ruma Chakraborty , a young independent working lady says , "I stay in a rented house in Guwahati and I belong to the LGBTQ community. I have decided to not get married as I am still unsure about getting into any kind of relationship. But that does not mean that I will not have company in future. Since I am very fond of children I may adopt a little one when I am ready."
Women have created opportunities for themselves that were unimaginable for women in the past. Single women in today's world are not like the women of bygone years where the patriarchal society was more evident. Today women make personal goals and strive for high standards whenever they undertake any activity. Confident women love themselves and have the full potential to challenge any wrongdoing of the society. They are in no way inferior to men. Such women who are focusing on their dreams and working hard for their achievable goals in cities are really not afraid of being single. They do not let their singleness come in the way of living a complete life.
By: Saswati Sarma
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