Belonging is a strong need of all humans. It is through connection with others that we thrive and flourish. Being isolated or excluded really hurts and we all feel it inside, irrespective of whether the exclusion is intentional or accidental.
MELANGE spoke to a couple of educators/teachers to understand how schools can teach students to be includes and create an inclusive culture. It's not enough to teach students what not to do; school also must teach them what to do to promote kindness, compassion and inclusion among their peers.
According to Rita Bhattacharjee a primary school teacher of a private school in Jorhat, says, "Children tend to be self-oriented, insular and can be unaware to the unspoken needs of others including their peers. Adults, including school staff, play an important role in showing students how to perceive and respond to other's needs. It is normal for children to get caught up in their usual groups. However, by showing the benefits of including others, adults can teach young people to look out for others who feel lonely and show how to act in intentional ways to help others be included."
"As adults, we may ignore or down play a child's behavior because it was not intended to be mean or hurtful but young people need our help to learn about acceptable behaviors and when we point out exclusionary behaviour in a non-judgmental and encouraging way they have an opportunity to learn," says Ambika Sharma, a child psychologist.
Talking with young people about what it means to exclude and how to include others helps build empathy and compassion and can prevent unintentional exclusion. "Teaching students and staff to be aware of their own actions will help reduce any unintentional exclusion on their part," observes Sharma.
According to Bhattacharjee, schools can teach students ways to scan and read an environment/situation to look for someone who is alone and might need a friend. "Teaching students how to meet and interact with new people is a good place to start. For example, teaching students how to introduce themselves and strike up a conversation, even if it feels awkward, will support them to become includers. The school staffs can role model conversation skills; showing how easy it is and consequently students will be more likely to give it a try. Moreover, school staff can also create awareness by pointing out when someone is playing alone and encouraging another student to ask them to join in the activity. Adults can show how easy it is to look out for others, and how good it feels to be an include," she elaborates.
Children need to be taught how to get into the habit of including others, otherwise they simply tend to assume that others will join in if they want to. Therefore schools should also consciously provide opportunities for connection.
In the words of Ambika, "School staff can provide deliberate opportunities in and out of the classroom for students to connect with peers outside their friendship group; this is particularly important for students who struggle to make friends or are not part of a group. Other ideas for school staff to provide students with opportunities for connection including mixing up student learning partners or groups, setting up social clubs, or giving students an inclusion role."
"Another idea that can be adopted is to challenge each student to talk with someone they don't know well each week and make the effort to get to know them. The educator can then run activities with the class such as having students record and discuss what they discovered about their new friend including their strengths, interests, and hobbies," observes Bhattacharjee.
All in all it is important that inclusion is a social skill and a value too. It is an important prerogative in adult life. And like almost all other social skills and values, inclusion too needs to be cultivated in individuals at an early stage of life.
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